Thursday, June 14, 2012

Things I need to work on.

Goodness. What a crazy week this has been. Not crazy, just boring. My family has been sick all week so I've not had much to do. I've spent the last two days with friends and that was fun, but I'm just can't get over this feeling of anxiousness over me.
Today was the last day I'll see my best friends for a week, and in about two weeks I am going on vacation. A week before I get back from vacation, I start an english class. I'm really nervous because I have no idea what to expect. I also am going to be extremely busy this coming fall. Plans for graduation, college planning, college classes, and the like.

All this stuff looming over me has got me worried, anxious, and doubts about the future. The bible says not to worry about anything but to instead pray about everything. I know this, but I seem to have a hard time putting it into practice. Maybe now is a time in my life where in I need to realize that I need to give up everything and just trust in God. I need realize that he's in control, and that I don't need to be worrying about all these things.

It's just not this one specific time in my life. I've always been a worrier. I get it from my dad. Sometimes I have worried myself sick. I don't know why. The one thing in my life I constantly need reminded of is that I worry too much. I need to trust in god and lay everything on him.

Of course, this is a much easier thing that is said than done. I need to put it into practice. 

I've noticed things. Whilst on the subject of a fault of mine, i might as well mention a few more. 
1. I worry to much.
2. I'm very self centered 
3. I'm impatient 

Number one has been discussed already. 

Number two. Yeah. I have terrible apathy. I think about myself way to often. I talk about myself too much. I know people who are selfless and always think of others, but that's just isn't how I am. I need to be a better servant.

Number three, yeah. I'm very impatient. I have zero. It's awful. I need to stop getting so impatient. Like a song i heard the other day: "I'm in a hurry to get things done, I rush and rush until life's no fun." this is me. I miss details when I rush. I need to slow down. I need to take more time and stop getting so impatient. 

What a blog post this was. I talked about some faults of mine. Yeah. I also sometimes wonder if people can tell if im a Christian or not. I dont always think this, but it's has crossed my mind on occasion. Am I showing gods love on everyday life? If I spent the day with someone, would they know I'm one? 

We, that's about it. It's 1130 and I'm tired. I hope that this has been an interesting blog post to the 5 people that actually read it. 

Josh

3 comments:

  1. Sounds like you're really thinking about stuff. It's a lot on anyone's shoulders, and the only way to cope with everything is to turn to God. I say that, but it's not always that easy. We have an inborn nature (a sin nature) to do everything ourselves. Sometimes it's easy to forget that worrying is actually a sin.

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    1. Agreed. At least you cam see your faults— that's probably one of the hardest parts. And most humans are self centered. It's natural, and hard to not put yourself as number one. Worrying: everyone worries. We shouldn't, but we do. it's hard to willingly trust God to keep us safe through the unknown, because, well, it's the unknown.

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  2. I am someone who reads this blog and I am humbled by the fine young man you are becoming. I am proud of you Josh. I see such maturity in your young soul. Yes, you have seen me worry and not trust way too much. But, you know there is hope and that you (and me) can trust God with our life. I love you...Dad.

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